Top Ten Yankee Excuses

10. Distracted by Hideki Irabu banging on locked door of dugout.

9. Too relaxed after pregame massage from Don Zimmer.

8. Wanted to spare New York drivers the gridlock of a victory parade.

7. Them curve balls sure is curvy.

6. Did a little too much "choking up" the night before the game.

5. Wanted to spend more time at home watching CBS's new fall schedule.

4. Tough to concentrate on baseball when you're heartsick about the Siegfried and Roy breakup.

3. Tired from trying to help Anne Heche and Ellen DeGeneres have a baby.

2. Hard to resist chance to piss off George Stein-brenner.

1. Only gave 109 percent.

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